The Tales , anecdotes.

1.Two rustic байкера. One asks other:
- And why beside you, neighbour, on vegetable garden so all grow the зашибецки, but beside me only прутики dry protrudes? than fertilize?
The Neighbour answers:
- Become cool говном from young sound organism! The Recipe idle time. Meal катацца - without fall find what-нидь пионЭр, which will greedy look at моц. Put to roll. Carry to itself. Zavozhu in shed, fasten the manacle to ceiling beem, take out of it trousers and dialect: "I maniac, scha egg to you to cut shall, I will go for ножницами on metal." Prinoshu their- пионэр from awe обсирается- here his(its) possible banish the kick, but shitty while warm, in vegetable garden on удобренье.
- Well.
Afterwards first байкер arrives and орQт neighbour: "Freak you, and advice your ugly!!!"
- What is a?
- yes here is, all I have done, as you has said... it was rolled down, on road has caught пионэра... дошло the deal before scissors on metal... I will go, type for them... go past моца... chyo-that so again покатацца wanted... sowed;sown, penetrated... afterwards has else penetrated... afterwards somehow invisibly before friends домчал... envy beside them... the девчонку has found... envy with her...
shorter, returned in week... but пионэр with hunger to ed!


2.Anecdote about байкершах
2057. Two old in all sense of the girlfriend sit on small bench, row on sun grey heads.
One speaks another:
- But remember, I in 2007-m has taken Hondochku Sibihu, turn black, аэрографию has done- here is here roses, roses, roses, but here snake in corona, but on сидушке skin under snake... So here is: you do not remember, with whom I then vein?


3.Leaves байкер from кафешки, here on he leans heavily on crowd, topple to the ground and flood the bottle of vodka in gulp.
And with shout "Yahoo, we saws with байкером!" run away.
Will Get up, is shaken off and pensive: "But after all love, bastard!"

Goes the pair in machine for city, suddenly them on mad velocity outstrips мотоциклист.
Go they further and see; cost(stand)s he on curb,size blinks, hand waves, asks to stop. Stopped.
-You saw, as I outstripped you?
-Well,
-Beside me behind woman was?

Ment останаливает мотоциклиста on Dukati999, approaches to him and speaks "Here, голубчик, hungs the sign - a speed limit 70км\ч, but you, old boy, flew all 250км\ч " мотоциклиЗд in answer "Well and as I on such velocities can see such small sign!"

One muzhik tells other:
I wife with moped compares - two tacts and впрыск!

The Bell in militia (drunk байкерский voice):
- A Hallo, beside me with baize steering wheel have stolen, and tank, and headlights no, and running boards.
- Peacefully, shall presently arrive, analyse.
In minute once again bell in militia. Same байкер:
- A Hallo, no need to arrive... Ik... The Back forward sat.

Gaec stops матасыклиста - approaches return honour and грит:
- A Lieutenant дивизиона Coachman's seat!
- Diviziona who?

Are going to two fleas on south, repose. What get plainly do not know, but have solved so: each gets its way, but will afterwards choose as better home go. Well, have left. The First has arrived греется on sun day, the second, the third... the girlfriends нету. Finally appears second, the whole is pricked from chill.
- That with you happened?
-Yes here is nothing not придумала what get, запрыгнула to байкеру on moustache, coldly, windy, but доехала.
- E-e-e possible more simply and better. Signifies so: jump in аэропорот, find the stewardess, запрыгиваешь under skirt - a heat, dryly, quickly and with comfort.
The Second agreed and solved so home get. Came time home. The First already building day, the second, the third... the girlfriends нету. Finally appears second, the whole is pricked from chill.
- That happened? I you has explained what get.
- I so and has done. Priskakala in азропорт, has found the stewardess an запрыгнула under skirt - a heat, dryly, well I and задремала - awake on moustache beside байкера

Two мужичка-пьянчуги were In two nearby villages of the vein-. Beside one of them was a boar, beside the other pig. One muzhik speaks:
-Let's their reduce, поросят продадим, money npoпьем?
-Only here is as I shall hear, when me its boar to carry to you?
-But what see that beside it tail by curlicue, so immediately пулей to me!
The Muzhik has got up with morning a little early, зашел in shed, sees, beside boar tail by curlicue, immediately puts on on it мотошлем, сажает in cradle of the sovnarkhoz and in nearby village straight. The following day history is repeated. The Third day on count saturday, early get up the muzhik in облом. He and speaks to wife:
-A Slopes, see, as beside our boar tail?
The Wife returns and answers:
-I do not know, as tail, but he already parcel of land send and sits in cradle!

Bayker was broken in a pipe, sowed;sown on baizes and has gone to ride on recirculating around city. Rides, rides, but near roads cost(stand)s the woman and голосует. Well he stopped, but she speaks:"man, I much тороплюсь on station, toss please!" Sowed;sown she and have gone. Go further: the first circle on recirculating, the second, the third, the fourth. The Woman:"Мужчина, we seem here already проезжали!" Bayker afraid turns: "Who here? !!?"

Go on мотоцыкле 3 чувака, 2 normal, but in the middle заика. Zaika speaks:
- B-b-b-b-b...
That that for meat loaf:
- That quicker?!
Zaika:
- B-b-b-b-b...
For meat loaf:
- That else quicker?!?
Zaika:
- B-b-b-b-b...
For meat loaf: - Where else quicker?!?!?
Zaika: - Б-б-б-орю has blown off!!!

The Wife байкера awoke early in the morning. She quietly вылезла from bed and on tiptoe подошла to the next newcomer baize, which peacefully stood in room, on the other hand loge, near by husband.
Vzyav beforehand stored razor, she изрезала whole rubber in scrap, acid брызнула on paint, enormous gas key сплющила frame in several places. The Spokes she neatly вывернула and has tied the nodes. The Discharge butter from fork she has splashed instead of it remainder of the acid. Hereon she neatly расклепала chain on 17 small bits. Kozhanoe saddle was drived away in arc by means of stranglehold, lovingly привернутых on eaten table in the same room.
Long whole resisted подседельный pin. But also his(its) manage to bend the banana, всунув in it mop and having tied got by gigantic lever back feather baize in node.
Hereon wife облегченно вздохнула and, having buried oneself in shoulder of the husband, peacefully заснула.
She did not know that to live she remained not more hour...

Flies up to the девчонка to байкеру on observation and щебечет:
- Will Roll me? What sit?
Bayker - conceived:
- Well first draw apart the legs...

Vomits байкер on задрипаном spendthrift under 80, but beside пассажирки - such small skirt that all undershorts and whole задницу видать. Behind already, the pillar выстроилась - all зырят. Bayker:
- Lead Lyusya, what I steep - outstrip nobody can not!

Go two Skina on street, one such whole worldly-wise but the second else салага!
Worldly-wise he interprets:
- here is see, cost(stand)s чувак in jeans - a hippie (дратса does not love and does not die) one you his(its) will cover!
a halitosis see one more in pipe cap кроссовки sound This рэпер (дратса loves but does not die ) two together you his(its) cover!
halitosis see one more in косухе in skin in rivet This metalworker (дратса does not love but die ) vsemerom- ввосьмером you his(its) cover!
Go further!
but halitosis see one more not shaved whole in наколках in skin and cossack This BAYKER so here is god forbid you his(its) mix up with Hippie!